Building mental ﬁtness for life’s ups and downs

by Elaine Fowler Senior Manager Support Services, ReachOut Australia

Life rarely moves in a straight line. Between navigating school or study, starting a career, managing relationships, and just ﬁguring out who you are, it’s normal to feel overwhelmed at times.

That’s where mental ﬁtness comes in. Mental ﬁtness is about building everyday habits that give you a solid foundation for coping. So when life hits you with an unexpected twist or a tough season, your mind has already got the tools and resilience to get through it, and the trust that things will be okay, despite the difficulty.

Whether you're a young person looking for practical ways to look after yourself, or a parent or carer wondering how best to support the teenager in your life, here are ﬁve tips for building mental ﬁtness.

1. Build the basics

When life gets busy, the ﬁrst things to slip are often the basics: sleep, food and movement. These fundamentals support our physical health but they also directly impact our brains, our moods, and even our stress levels.

If you're not feeling your best, start small. You could try setting a gentle wind-down routine 30–60 minutes before bed (ideally screen-free), drinking enough water throughout the day, or ﬁnding a form of movement you actually enjoy and schedule it into your day. Even a short walk counts.

If you’re a parent or carer supporting your young person with the basics you might like to focus on what you can do at home. For example, having the kitchen stocked with snacks during exam time, or working with them to set household routines around tech-free times, can be good places to start.

2. Realistic self-talk

We all have an inner monologue. Some louder than others, some more catastrophic than others, and some unkinder than others. It’s very easy for the inner critic to step in.

Noticing your mindset and what you say to yourself, especially during tough times, can have a big impact on how you’re feeling and how you face a challenge. Reframing your self-talk is about practising self-compassion rather than trying to force positive thoughts. For example you might ask yourself: Would I say this to a friend who is going through the exact same thing?

For parents and carers, it’s important to keep in mind that your young person learns a lot from the behaviour you model. Sharing your own challenges openly and demonstrating self-compassion can be good examples for them to see. It shows them that sitting with discomfort and uncertainty is okay and part of the process.

3. Practise gratitude

It’s easy for our brains to zoom in on the things that seem to be going wrong. If you can practise noticing small, consistent and helpful moments in each day, it can help bring you perspective during tough times.

Gratitude doesn't mean ignoring real problems or pretending everything is ﬁne. It’s simply giving equal time to the good things. Try taking 30 seconds at the end of the day to name three small moments that made you smile, a great song you heard, or something nice a friend said.

For parents and carers, try gently weaving this practice into family life without making it feel like a chore. Asking open-ended questions like, ‘What was something funny or unexpected that happened today? over dinner or on the drive home, can shift focus toward connection and positive moments. Sharing your own small wins with your children is a great way to start the conversation and invite them to share.

4. Self-care

Self-care can feel like a buzzword. Something we’re supposed to do but aren’t really sure how to. True self-care looks like small, achievable and consistent daily activities that absorb your attention, lower your stress, provide a sense of fulﬁlment, and give your mind a genuine break from worry.

Self-care looks different for everyone. It can include things like painting, playing music, socialising with friends, grounding techniques, cooking, writing, or spending time in nature. Practising self care can help you to feel better in the moment and in the long term too.

Making space for these activities regularly can sometimes be the hardest part. Self-care can sometimes feel indulgent or less important than things like work or school. But without it, we can experience a compounding stress over time and even burnout.

We hear from many parents and carers that their teen’s self-care looks very different from theirs. Recognising this and giving your young person space to engage in hobbies that bring them joy, without judgment, can have a big impact on their wellbeing.

5. Build and lean on your support network

You don't have to go through tough times on your own. Sustaining mental ﬁtness means investing in your support network, and knowing who is there for you (socially, professionally and medically). Reaching out for support can be hard, but it’s often one of the best things you can do to look after your mental health.

If you’re a young person and need help, ReachOut can be a good place to start. You can learn more about what’s going on for you and explore what support options are available. This might look like talking to someone you trust, connecting with a peer worker via ReachOut PeerChat, or making an appointment with your GP.

Parents and carers can help young people by keeping the lines of communication open and sharing different support options with them if needed. ReachOut Parents is a great place to start if you’re looking for more information and advice about supporting your teen. You can also get free parent coaching through ReachOut Parents One-on-One Support.

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About ReachOut

ReachOut is the leading online mental health service in Australia supporting young people during tough times.

ReachOut helps young people feel better about today and the future, no matter what challenge they’re facing. They provide a safe place where young people can openly express themselves, explore what’s happening in their lives, connect with people who understand their situation, and find the resources to help them manage their challenges now and in the future.

Anonymous, free and 100% online, ReachOut has been designed specifically for – and with – young people. From one-to-one support from experienced peer workers, to tips, stories and resources, ReachOut offers a wide range of support options that allow young people to engage in the ways they want to, when they want to, and has been doing so for more than 20 years.

And, ReachOut Parents and ReachOut Schools provide valuable information, resources and advice to help parents, carers and educators to better understand the young people in their lives and to play an active role in their wellbeing.